If it wasn’t for the last minute, nothing would get done!

12-June 2009

Before I decided to ditch my last job (the longest I’ve had: 5 years and 8 months) to go to England – without the prospect of another job or any idea what the heck should I be doing when we’re not sightseeing, I had this delusion that I just might be able to crack on freelance writing or any odd virtual jobs I might chance upon.

Three months later however, I still haven’t done anything productive. I became even lazier, gained a few kilos and am still as apprehensive as ever about what will happen to my career as an HR practitioner. I am not even blogging that much or submitting applications as much as I ought to.

Don’t get me wrong though — I am very much grateful of this experience and I don’t think I’ll ever regret coming here. I guess I am just annoyed with myself for not doing the things that I think I should do.

I reckon it happened because I have been so accustomed as a private employee, doing everything based on my job description, management deadlines and expectations hence, now that I am suddenly given the option to do whatever I want to do, I feel lost, unstructured and scared.

Despite of all the ideas in my head, I was too afraid to try it lest I fail or get rejected.

I still have about 2 months left and now I am cramming as usual. It’s a bad habit I know but for now, I ought to just give my own arse a good kick!

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